The Beginning of Something

Since I last wrote I managed to get all the boxes unpacked.  Yahoo!!  Unfortunately there is still work to do.  Primarily in Madeleine's room.  So much stuff, so little room.  I thought I did a good job of purging before we moved but it looks like I didn't get rid of enough.

We're into our summer schedule now that Madeleine has finished her first year of school.  We had a really nice day on her promotion day and now we are here in summer figuring out how to coordinate our time since I am working weird hours including weekends for the first time in about 10 years.  We have some friends helping us.  My sister is in the midst of packing and she and her family will be moving back to the east coast next week.  I can't even go there.  I came to the west coast to be near family - specifically my sister's family - and now they are leaving.  A story for another time.  Here is a picture of Mom and Madeleine on her promotion day:

Anyway, since my sister is moving she can't really help out with this new schedule so some friends offered to help. Of course I realize this can't go on forever but for now we're ok.  Honestly I think my biggest problem is she is spending time with families with many more kids than at home and she is having a blast....makes it hard to come home to our little apartment and just Mom when you are at an age where all you want to do is play for the most part.  When I tell her it is time to go home when I go to pick her up she often tries to delay it and will say "it just isn't fair" (a line I think she picked up from watching "7th Heaven").  Hurts me a little and I hope she doesn't feel like an outsider for the rest of her life since she always has to leave these bigger families and come home.  I do though want her to have the experience of being in a larger family so she can know what it is like to have mother, father and sisters and brothers...so as I've picked up this saying lately - "it is what it is".

As far as Ellie, our moose dog, goes it has been somewhat of a challenge taking care of her.  I spend far more time taking of her now than I did on the horse property.  There I could just let her out.  Here we are going on walks and going to the dog park and playing.  I can't imagine what it is like for her being in this apartment all day.  Since I feel extremely guilty so much of my free time is spent on getting her out of doors.  Perhaps I am getting more exercise than I would normally but it does often take time away from other things I need to do.  But if we going to keep her I see no other way.

I even bought her a kiddie pool and keep it on our patio where she can go out and wade in it during the day should she feel the need.  We'll have to see how this all goes...but for now we are keeping her.

I miss our beautiful space on the horse property and it even pains me to look at the pictures but I believe we are where we are supposed to be and I believe this is the beginning of a new journey for us.  I haven't put all the pieces together as to where we are going, but it is the first place we've lived in Arizona totally on our own.  It is the beginning of something, I just don't know quite what yet.